Escapism isn't enough. It's time to take action.

Posted on July 30, 2020

In April, I started writing the newsletter that would become this post.

Back then, it was called “What to Do During the Pandemic.” I abandoned it, thinking we wouldn’t be on lockdown for much longer. Soon, I thought, the pandemic would be under control and we’d go back to our overburdened lives. We wouldn’t need ways to occupy our time or distract ourselves from a new, discomforting reality. We would grieve the lives lost to the pandemic, but we would move forward into some semblance of recognizable order.

That hasn’t happened.

Instead, COVID-19 continues to ravage the United States without any effort by the federal government to coordinate a nationwide, science-based plan to combat the virus.

Instead, on May 26th, George Floyd died after being restrained beneath the knee of an arresting officer for nearly eight minutes, despite his pleas, “I can’t breathe!”

Instead, protests arose in support of Black Lives Matters — mostly peaceful, though marked by looters with alternate agendas — and haven’t stopped, with protesters around the world continuing to call for systemic change; to demand it. 

Instead, Trump responded to these calls to action by quelling protests–whether peaceful or not–with unprecedented military threats, force, and violence.

Instead.

Our everyday lives continue. We still need to work and pay bills. We need to feed our families and educate our children. Some of us, like me and my husband, are privileged to be able to work mostly from home and avoid excessive exposure to the virus. Some of us are able to help our children stay on track while they learn online. We have been able to truly lock down and increase the odds that the virus passes us by. 

Others aren’t as lucky: frontline workers whose jobs put them at daily risk; children without internet or computers who’ve missed months of their education; younger children’s parents who are overwhelmed with work, childcare, educational responsibilities foisted on them by online learning; people unemployed due to lockdown closures who are on the brink of joining the ranks of those sleeping in cars, shelters, tents pitched beneath freeway underpasses.

So, yes, just as we did in April, when I set aside this newsletter, we need to occupy our time; to distract ourselves from the unrest and uncertainty that often feels crippling.

But how? 

In our house, we’ve defaulted (too much) to television for distraction. We’ve rewatched silly, mindless stuff like “The Office,” “Malcolm in the Middle,” and many other series that help us forget our current circumstances.

I’ve also been reading, listening to audio books and podcast after podcast while walking my unruly dog. I had planned to list my favorites but then realized there were too many books and podcasts I love to ever do a favorites list justice.

Besides, escapism is no longer enough of a distraction.

Escapism isn’t enough.

It no longer soothes my throat-clutching anxiety, which permeates my writing. Actually, I’ve been struggling to write at all, fiction especially.

Nonfiction has been easier. It allows me to puzzle through our current chaos. For instance, I interviewed Aimee Liu for The Rumpus about her fantastic new book Glorious Boy, which, though centered around World War II, examines racism and its antidotes in ways that feel intimately attuned to our times.

I also rewrote an interview for Angels Flight literary West. The piece — in which I was interviewed by the wonderful Luis Garcia Romero — was supposed to be published this past winter but was put on hold due to the pandemic. When AFLW recently gave me a July publication date, I asked whether I could rewrite my answers, which I’d written at the beginning of 2020. So much has changed since then. I needed to rewrite the interview to reflect on my privilege during the current pandemic and how it compares to my grandmother’s lack of privilege and devastating loss during the 1918 flu pandemic; I needed to reflect upon my ability to write about race given the limits of my own subconscious biases and microaggressions. I needed to reflect upon how I can educate myself so that I can write about race with truth and clear sighted compassion.

Revising my ability to imagine other worlds has been far more difficult. I find myself wondering whether art matters right now — whether my own fiction matters at all. To bolster my confidence, I’ve become more active in Women Who Submit, whose mission is to support women writers in publishing. With them, I check in weekly about my goals for my work. I write with them daily during silent writing Zooms, which I also do with my incredible writers’ group that’s been together for almost a decade.

I’ve tried, too, to offer a safe space for other writers in my Prompted classes, where writers come together and write with no demands, no judgment, just an openhearted embrace of whatever they’re able to produce during a particular evening.

But there is more to be done. I need to do more. I need to attend more protests. I need to write postcards and letters and make phone calls to help get out the vote and install new leadership that is willing to initiate essential systemic change. I need to speak out more when I disagree with people instead of walking away to avoid an argument. I need to ensure my son knows that he cannot sit idly by when faced with discrimination, racism, blatant disregard for human life and suffering. He must stand up, speak out, protest. And vote. Always, always vote.

The issues at stake — the lives at stake — are too important.  

This isn’t what I set out to write, but it’s the only thing I could write.

Imagine. Create. Believe in change.

Above all, take action.

Thanks for being part of my community. Stay safe and healthy.

Colette

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